Upcoming Event: 124 Street Red Shoe Crawl on Sept 10

Tiramisu Bistro on 124 Street. Photo from: 124street.ca

Tiramisu Bistro on 124 Street. Photo from: 124street.ca

I was recently told about the upcoming Red Shoe Crawl taking place in the 124 Street District of Edmonton on Saturday, September 10. From what I’ve learned, this is the second year where 124 Street will play host to the event.

If you’ve never heard of the Red Shoe Society, it consists of a network of community leaders who band together to volunteer for and host events where they raise funds for Ronald McDonald House Charities Northern Alberta (RMHCNA).

Registrants who purchase a $35 pass ($15 kids tickets and adult 4-packs for $120 are also available) will be welcomed at about two dozen participating businesses along 124 Street. Culinary delights will be served at each venue, allowing patrons to snack while they explore. The various shops and restaurants in the area may also be offering special one-day deals. Passports will be handed out to everyone to ensure they don’t miss any of the vendors, including Duchess Bake Shop, Carbon Environmental Boutique, Miss Boss Handbags & Accessories, Table Top Cafe, Ascendant Books and many more.

In addition, tickets for raffle prizes and a 50/50 draw will be sold.

Not only is this a fantastic way to support the RMHCNA, but it’s also an excellent opportunity to shop local. 124 Street has had a tough go over the last couple of years. With the temporary closure of the 102 Avenue bridge cutting off one of the main entry ways into the area, the majority of businesses saw a decline in visitors. Now that the bridge is once again open and the Red Shoe Crawl will be raising money in the district, there’s really no excuse not to go.

Tickets for this event can be purchased here: http://rssnaredshoecrawl.kintera.org/faf/home/default.asp?ievent=1162884.

Get excited by checking out a video of 2015’s Red Shoe Crawl below!

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Things I Learned From a Book About Finding Love

One of the daily practices prescribed in the book, Calling in "The One."

One of the daily practices prescribed in the book, Calling in “The One.”

My friend talked a couple of us into starting a book club with her. The book was Calling in “The One”: 7 Weeks to Attract the Love of Your Life by Katherine Woodward Thomas. Needless to say, I was skeptical. It ultimately took half a year to finish, but I did it. Six months for a seven week program, or approximately 178 days versus the 49 it should supposedly take. The point is, it was more drawn out than it should have been.

Nevertheless, we juggled our work schedules, hobbies, social lives along with the readings and exercises, and, eventually, we managed to finish our final discussion. It has been about a month since our group last met, and I’m not sure the premise of the book worked. It may have for one of my friends, just not for me. Not yet, anyway. Granted, it doesn’t guarantee love is going to magically appear in your life within the time allotted on the cover.

Rather, as I worked my way through the pages from cover to cover, I understood that it’s not about doing things to make you seem more attractive on the surface. Instead, it’s a matter of getting to know who you are as a person, aiming to better yourself, and knowing that what you put out there is what you hope to receive in return because that’s what you deserve, for better or worse.

Honestly, I never imagined I’d read a book like this. I didn’t think it would come down to that. Then again, I never used to think I’d try speed dating or online dating, so never say never! However, despite my reservations, I found the author’s writings to be quite interesting and insightful, even when I felt like the examples didn’t quite apply to me. So, if you’re interested in giving Calling in “The One” a go, I’d recommend it.

If you’d prefer not to, but you’re wondering what kinds of nuggets are tucked away in the tome, I thought it would be good for me to list out the most important things I learned (or, at least, was reminded of) and to share them with you.

We are connected to everyone and everything.

We are connected to everyone and everything.

1. We might all live in our own little bubbles at times, but it’s important to remember that you are connected to everyone and everything. Think of the butterfly effect.

2. It’s necessary to make room for people in your life. If you cannot literally set aside space or time for them, you’re probably not mentally ready for a relationship.

3. Know what makes you happy and understand that you are allowed to be a bit selfish. Ask for what you want and need. Be okay with what people are willing and able to give to you.

4. Be the person you want to attract in your life. For example, you can’t expect to snag someone who’s ambitious if you’re perpetually lazy.

5. Have an idea of what you want in life. Vision boards can help you better visualize your goals and possibly guide you towards them.

6. Understand that you’re a work in progress and so is everyone else in this world. People are not perfect, but it’s important to be the best we’re capable of being at any given moment.

7. Believe that sometimes a loss is actually a gain. Often times, things happen for a reason, even if the reason isn’t clear at first.

8. Avoiding toxic ties and all around negativity is paramount in life. If we stew in all the bad, it makes it really hard to wash it out. Strive to be as positive as possible and only keep those whom you trust and who make you happy in your inner circle. Read about my quest for positivity here.

9. Take each mistake or failure as an opportunity to learn and improve yourself.

10. Life and love may not turn out to be exactly as you pictured, but it’s not necessarily a bad thing. Be open to possibilities.

11. Nurture any passions you have or think you might have because they build your character and make you who you are.

Simple pleasures can make a big impact.

Simple pleasures can make a big impact.

12. Live in the moment. Appreciate things as they happen because it may be your one and only chance to experience it. Show gratitude for even the smallest things because simple pleasures often make the biggest impact.

13. Know your own boundaries and don’t be afraid to draw lines if you need to. Others should have the decency to respect them. You’re allowed to say no and to speak up for yourself.

14. Your worries really can be put in a box and forgotten about until you wish to bring them out again. This one probably requires a little bit of explaining. One of the practices we were tasked with doing one week was to select a box, decorate it and then fill it with all of your worries. When you were done, you literally sealed them away. It made me realize that life can be overwhelming. We’re often trying to deal with multiple things at once. Yet, sometimes, it’s best to deal with difficult situations one at a time. It’s kind of a daunting thought, but if something isn’t solved right away, it’ll always be there later. For me, when I put my stresses on paper and then tucked them into my wisdom box, I felt so much lighter, and, truthfully, since I did that, I haven’t really dwelt as much on each and every thing that had been weighing me down.

15. There’s no point in having regrets about the past. You can’t change the past (unless you have a time machine). Just be sure to do the things you want to do now (as long as it’s feasible for you), so you don’t have any regrets in the future.

16. There are things I’d love to change about myself physically. However, it’ll either take a lot of time or it’s simply not going to happen (save for a body swap), so know that nobody has a truly perfect body (not even supermodels). You can be thankful for every inch of yourself for some reason or another. Ex. I wish my legs were longer and a lot slimmer, but, hey, I have legs and they give me the ability to walk. Win!

17. Cultivate solitude. You need to know who you are by yourself to know who you are when you’re with others. Read my post about being alone, but not lonely here.

18. Take some risks. Be a “yes” person.

Writing this post is my version of a personal risk. I probably would have been embarrassed to tell people about something like this in the past, but, nowadays, I believe that sharing is caring. I hope these words may inspire some of you or help you on your journeys in life and love. All the best!

Living a Positive Life

Folded papers with my positivity notes written on them.

Folded papers with my positivity notes written on them.

I’m not one to make resolutions when the new year rolls around. My track record when it comes to seeing them through isn’t great. So, I’m not calling this a resolution. It’s more a change of heart and mind, and this is something I opted to do in the last quarter of 2014.

Most of the previous year, I endeavoured, along with a couple of friends, to work through a book that was going to help us find love. Maybe it sounds a little silly, but it’s not like cupid had been knocking on my doorstep, so I figured I had nothing to lose. While not everything discussed in the book and during our club sessions felt entirely applicable to me, it was still an eye opening experience that helped to pave a little more of the path I should strive to follow.

All-in-all, the book wasn’t some immediate solution to solving my woes in the relationship department. However, it did give me more insight into the things that are important to me, and important to opening myself up to receiving what I need and want.

More than anything, I realized that I was beating myself up too much. I’ve always been one to compare myself to others. Yet, I understand that doing that serves no purpose. Over time I’ve begun to see that everything isn’t always what it seems. The people who have what look like picture perfect lives on the surface, may be suffering inside. Who knows, right?

The biggest takeaway for me as we reached the half way mark of the book was that I had to stop letting negativity into my life. I have always prided myself on being a very positive person. I hate to see sadness or disappointment, so I try to be a light. Sometimes it’s hard though. I’m well aware that things aren’t always sunshine and roses. Watching or reading news stories can get me down fast, thinking about where I am in my career and knowing I’m not even close to where I want to be bums me out, and other peoples’ consistently pessimistic views of the world push me to grow weary, but I finally decided that I had to counteract that.

As crazy as it may sound, I now believe that if you think and act optimistically – see the glass half full – you’ll feel a thousand times better. You can’t expect to think bad thoughts and not have them continue to affect you. Just saying you’re doing well when someone asks, even if you’re really not, works wonders. Honestly, it’s all a state of mind.

One of the best ways to do this is to remember all the things you’re grateful for. Do this every single day, not just once a year on Thanksgiving. Appreciate the little moments.

A joy jar that holds all of my wonderful memories until I shake them out come New Year's Eve 2015 and read them one by one...I think I need a bigger one!

A joy jar that holds all of my wonderful memories until I shake them out come New Year’s Eve 2015 and read them one by one…I think I need a bigger one!

That’s why I’ve started contributing to my joy jar. Every single time something that is nice, happy, funny, exciting or any other number of positively skewed adjectives happens, I’m going to write about it on a piece of paper, fold it up and place it into some sort of container. When New Year’s Eve 2015 finally arrives, I’m dumping each piece of paper out, and I’m going to go through them one by one to remind myself of just how fabulous my life has been and is. Big or small, I want my memories to be good ones.

Here are some rules that I think are essential to live by:

Be part of the solution. Pursue your interests, you never know where they may lead. Be a good friend. Listen to people, sometimes it’s all they require of you. Be your own person; avoid comparisons to others. Love fully and truthfully. Be giving and forgiving. Don’t hold things in, it never ends well. Be in the moment. Accept compliments. Be kind because kindness spreads. Smile.

Toshl: Be a Budget Maven

We are now into the second month of 2014 and I’ve been thinking more about the things I choose to spend my money on. January is a time when we all tend to tighten the belt when it comes to our wallets. However, once we pass that point, and we’ve paid off our holiday bills, does it return to normal? Do we go back to buying our daily Starbucks coffees, purchasing the latest version of Apple’s iPhone, watching movies every weekend at the theatre?

I’m pretty good for the most part. I own my home, so I make sure to pay my mortgage and all my bills in full every month, but I also like to indulge by eating out with friends, going to concerts, and traveling. I certainly don’t think that’s a terrible thing. As the saying goes, you only live once. You’re also only young once. Why hoard all my money away for retirement? It’s still important to have some fun while I can enjoy it.

I’m responsible with my money though. If I can’t afford something, I don’t buy it. But, I guess, I’m also lucky that I can pretty much do whatever I want. I don’t have a husband or kids that rely on me. As long as I am able to provide for myself, I’m in good hands.

Even so, I still think that my spending requires a bit of an overhaul. For several years now, I’ve kept track of my monthly expenses by listing it out on paper or on my phone in my Colornote app. And, while it’s great to write it down, I don’t necessarily know what specifically my money is spent on in terms of percentages. I’m aware that I’m spending and of the total, but, at the same time, I’m not aware of the details.

Recently, I came across the fantastic Toshl app and started using their website (changes made on your phone or on the computer should sync up). Although the free program is a little more limited than the pro version (you can only create one budget and enter one income every month), it still really allows you to drill down on your expenses and see where your money is going.

From what I can tell so far, you can add as many expense lines as you need to per month and each cost can be tagged – either general or really refined (i.e. meals vs. gum) – and those tags can then be grouped, so you can see a breakdown of how much you spent on the essentials, such as housing, utilities and groceries, as well as the amount used on extraneous purchases like clothes, music, or lottery tickets.

The breakdown of my January 2014 expenses. Tagged into categories and shown based on percentage of the month's total spending. Grabbed from my Toshl account.

The breakdown of my January 2014 expenses. Tagged into categories and shown based on percentage of the month’s total spending. Screenshot grabbed from my Toshl account.

I won’t tell you how much of my monthly income was used in January, but I can tell you I was shocked to see how little of it I actually managed to save for a rainy day.

So, how am I going to change that? I don’t necessarily believe that I have to cut out all the fun things I fill my time with by becoming a complete hermit. Yet, I can probably find a smarter way to fit those things in without breaking the bank.

Rather than hitting up every concert that comes to town, pick just a few where I’m dying to see that artist live. Pack my lunch or snacks to work most days and eat out less. Learn to cook some new recipes at home rather than dining at a restaurant. Set aside a chunk of change annually for travel and split up the amount however I see fit. Invite friends over for a meal, movie or games and just talk. If I want to go out, look for vouchers on sites like Groupon or LivingSocial that can provide me with discounts on lunch, dinner, entertainment, travel, etc.

I’ve read about the debt that many people find themselves in nowadays. Banks let customers take out small loans with big interest rates that they know most of their clients can’t actually pay back and many people are paying just the minimum on their credit card bills, but it doesn’t have to be that way for many of you.

Whichever way you choose to monitor or curb your spending, it is something I would highly recommend to everyone. All it takes are a few small steps at a time.

I want to be able to experience what I can at this moment and save for my future. This new year and new perspective of my personal finances will hopefully lead to that.

Spreading Positivity & Inspiring Others

Brighten someone's day and then pay it forward!

Brighten someone’s day and then pay it forward!

I’ve got an experiment in the works!

Starting in December I’ll be handing out positivity cards to friends and strangers. My hope is that they will share with me how they felt about receiving the note. Once they have, I ask that they pass their card onto another deserving soul.

For more information about this idea and to leave me a message, click here to head to the “Brighter Days Ahead” page.

And, if you’re not in the Edmonton area, but are in the mood to lift someone else’s spirits, just write a note and pass it forward. Then come back and tell me about the recipient’s reaction and how you felt about spreading some joy.

Peace & love!

Crystal